


Nine Years and Yet it Feels Like Yesterday

by RowanWhitethorn333



Category: Veronica Mars (TV)
Genre: F/M, Original Character(s)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-03
Updated: 2020-12-09
Packaged: 2021-03-08 19:48:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,895
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27372196
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RowanWhitethorn333/pseuds/RowanWhitethorn333
Summary: Logan and Veronica have not seen each other since that fateful day Veronica walked out of his life, as well as Neptune. Nine years later, they meet again, and everything has changed. Or so it seems. Because in the end... they are still epic. This is a multi-chap AU fic that takes place after season 3, not movie compliant.
Relationships: Logan Echolls/Veronica Mars
Comments: 15
Kudos: 37





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys! So this is a little AU idea that just popped into my head. It takes place after season 3, but is not movie compliant. However, some small details (such as how long it's been, their careers, ect) from the movie will be included. I do not own Veronica Mars. I only own this plot, as well as a love for LoVe. Please R&R!

Logan Echolls strode into the pub in downtown New York, laughing along with the two men next to him.

"And then I said, 'YOU SHOULD'VE SEEN IT COMING!" said the man on Logan's left. This punchline sent the three men into another bout of laughter.

"I'll have to remember that one, Rhandy," Logan said, grinning. "Now, why don't you two gentlemen sit down, and I'll go get us some drinks so we can celebrate our business deal."

Rhandy, Logan's business partner, as well as former fellow Navy officer, replied, "And in the meantime, you should check out that blonde sitting up front. She seems hot, man. Try to get her number."

Cole, the guy Logan and Rhandy had just struck a deal with, let out a laugh. "I bet you 20 dollars that he gets some by the end of the night."

They started bantering back and forth, and wandered over to an empty table. Logan rolled his eyes at their antics, and headed towards the bar, stopping next to where the girl was seated.

"Hi, I'll take three beers please", Logan said to the bartender. The bartender nodded, taking the money, and went to get the drinks.

Logan couldn't help it. Even though he thought it was ridiculous Rhandy and Cole were betting, he was still a guy, and therefore it was only natural that he turned his head to see what the blonde looked like. But as he cast his gaze over her, he did a double take.

It had been nine years since he's last seen her, but not a day went by where he didn't think of her. But she didn't look the same as she did in his mind. Her hair was longer than he remembered, flowing down past her shoulders, ending near her lower back. She seemed thinner, and also a bit pale. She looked smaller, weaker. As if the years had finally weighed down on her, even though she used to be able to carry the weight of the world on her shoulders. Instead, as she turned her head and met his gaze, all he saw was an endless void in those blue eyes that used to burn with so much life.

"Veronica?!" Logan said, in disbelief.

Slowly, as if awakening from a dream, Veronica's eyes widened in recognition, and her tired expression morphed into a grin. "Logan!"

She jumped off the chair, straight into Logan's arms. She stumbled, and Logan quickly caught her, holding her upright. She giggled, and said tipsily, "Oopsies!"

As she straightened up, she looked into the face of her long-lost lover. The years had obviously matured him. He had grown even more handsome, which she hadn't thought was possible, and she could tell just by looking in his eyes he was no longer the boy she had left behind all those years ago. After all, she still had the skills of a PI, even if she was a bit drunk and hadn't worked on a case in years.

Normal Veronica would've been too taken aback by the fact Logan Echolls was standing in front of her to say anything, and most likely would've run away. But a tipsy Veronica did the exact opposite. She gripped Logan's arm tightly, and started babbling.

"Logan, it's so good to see you! I've missed you sooooo much! I can't believe you're here! What are you doing here anyways? Don't you still live in Neptune? Not that I've been stalking you online anything, cuz why would I do that? I totally don't know that you were in the Navy for 5 years, and you launched your own company 3 years ago, and it is a great success. Just like you probably don't know I'm a hot-shot New York lawyer now, and gave up the PI biz a LOOOONG time ago. Because why would we know what each other is up to. We said our goodbyes 9 years ago. Well, more like I said get out of life..." Veronica trailed off, suddenly embarrassed despite her rather inebriated state.

Logan stared down at the girl in his arms, not sure how to react. He knew for a fact that if Veronica was sober, she wouldn't be talking to him like this, much less clinging to him like a lifeline. His first thought was that he should turn around and leave. Why should he torture himself like this, with the only girl he ever truly loved in his arms, while he knew that this was probably the last place Veronica wanted to be. But when his eyes met hers once more, he knew. He couldn't leave her even if he wanted to. They were tied together, he and Veronica. And he gazed at Veronica, he realized despite the time, the distance, and the memories (both good and bad) between them, she still needed him as much as he needed her. It didn't matter how much the years had changed both of them, because in the end, he was still Logan and she was still Veronica and they were them. They were still epic. They always had been, and they always will be.

With a small sigh, Logan reached down and picked up Veronica, carrying her bridal style.

"Logan!" Veronica exclaimed. "What are you doing? Put me down!" her words were slurred, and Logan could barely understand what she was saying.

"You're drunk, Veronica. VERY drunk. So I am going to take you home, ok?"

"Ohhhhh that's probably a good idea. Except," she giggled, "I don't remember where I live."

Despite himself, Logan had to fight hard to suppress his smile. Damn had he missed this girl.

Still carrying her, he walked over to the table where Rhandy and Cole were seated. They gaped at him as he approached, trying to process that he was holding a barely conscious girl.

"Hey, uh, when we said "get her number", we didn't mean "kidnap her while she is drunk out of her mind", Rhandy said, recovering first.

Logan laughed lightly. "Boys, I would like you to meet Veronica Mars."

Rhandy stared at Logan in shock. Through their years of friendships, he had managed to dig out the entire story of this tragical romance.

"Who?" asked Cole, not having heard the tale.

Rhandy shot him a look that said, "tell you later," and turned his gaze back on Logan.

"Logan..." Rhandy started.

"Look, I know your feelings towards her. i know you hate that she broke my heart, because you're an awesome friend. But I broke hers too. And right now..." Logan looked affectionately at Veronica curled against his chest, now fast asleep. "She needs me. I'm taking her back to my hotel room, and please don't argue with me on this, ok?"

After a slight hesitation, Rhandy said, "You can take the rental car. I'll get a cab."

"Thank you," Logan said gratefully. "I'll call you tomorrow, okay?"

And with that, Logan carried Veronica out the bar, and into the busy streets.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's Chapter 2! Hope you enjoy!

The first thing Veronica realized when she woke up, curled on her side, was that she had no memory of where she was and how she had got there. The second thing she realized was that she was only wearing underwear and a T-shirt, which felt too large to be hers. Third, someone was lying beside her with an arm was draped across her, and she didn't know who it was. But from the build of the body pressed against her, she could tell it was a male. Immediately, she tensed up, trying to keep calm so she didn't wake up the other person, buying herself some time to get it together.

But on the inside, she was freaking out. The last time she had woken up in a strange bed with absolutely no memory was Shelly Pomeroy's party. What if something similar had happened again? Or what if she had agreed to it but just didn't remember? Oh, god, how could she be so stupid? She knows she wasn't drugged; but she did have a killer headache, meaning she had gotten drunk as hell last night. But wait... her underwear was on. If something had happened... she probably wouldn't be clothed at all, right?

Suddenly, the feeling of lips pressing against her bare shoulder where the shirt had slipped off interrupted her downward spiral. She should've flinched, or become more panicked, at the contact. Instead, her body relaxed against her will. The lips continued to gently peck at her shoulder, and she felt them curve into a smile, as if he knew exactly what it was doing to her.

Then it hit her why she felt so at peace. **HE** had always done this to calm her down. And now she thought about it, the scent that surrounded her was so achingly familiar. It smelled like home, and...

No. It couldn't be. Could the person behind her actually be-

"Good morning, Bobcat."

Logan Echolls.

* * *

Veronica quickly flipped around, her eyes locking with his. She froze again, this time for a different reason. How does one react to waking up in bed next to the ex-boyfriend she hasn't see in nine years, three months, and seventeen days? (Not that she had been counting. Of course not). A normal person would probably turn around and attempt to talk. But when did Veronica ever do anything the normal way? Which is why she immediately jumped out of the bed and sprinted to the bathroom, locking the door behind her.

Logan couldn't say he was surprised at her reaction. It was VERONICA, after all. He should've known she would run away again, like she always did. He understood why she did it. So many people had walked out of her life (some by choice, like her mom. Some unwillingly, like Lilly), and she had gained the habit of walking out before someone else could. But it still hurt. He had tried several times to get her to trust him. And yes, he had broken that trust a few times. But he wasn't the same guy he had been nine years ago. He just wished she would stay long enough to realize that. Logan let out a sad sigh. It also hurt that unlike he had hoped, she didn't seem to miss him as much as he had her.

* * *

Veronica stood in front of the sink, staring at her reflection in the mirror, lost in her own thoughts. Truthfully, she had no idea how she felt. Whenever Logan was involved, she got overwhelmed by all the different emotions that came over her.

" _Ok, Veronica_ ", she thought to herself. " _Let's think logically here_."

So, just like she did when analyzing a case, she processed everything step by step.

First of all, she no longer had to worry that something had happened last night and she just didn't remember. It may have been a long time since she'd interacted with Logan Echolls, but she knew for a fact that he would never take advantage of her, or anyone, like that.

Second, she could roughly guess what had occurred last night. She remembered going into the bar, since she had just lost a case, and recalled ordering several shots. That's where her memory ended. She assumed that Logan had walked into the bar and found her drunk, and therefore brought her back to his hotel room. What Logan was doing in New York, she had no idea.

And that led her to the last thing. How exactly did she feel about seeing Logan again? She never thought about the possibility of seeing him again, no matter how naive that seemed.

She closed her eyes, recalling the moment she had told Logan that she no longer wanted him to be a part of her life, feeling the regret that had haunted her every moment since.

Then she thought about this morning, waking up in his arms, his soft lips burning her skin. How had she lived so long without him? How had she lived for nine years without those eyes, that smile, his touch? How had she lived for so long without that comforting embrace, that gentle look in his eyes, that god-damned infuriating smirk?

The answer was obvious. She hadn't been living. She'd been surviving. Since she had left Neptune, that was all she had done. She survived the brand new cities without a familiar face in sight. She survived working as a lawyer, hating every minute of it, as it slowly drained the life out of her. She hated everything about the last nine years of her life.

She hadn't truly _lived_. How could she, without those she loved. She missed her dad, Wallace, and Mac. Heck, she even sort of missed Dick in a weird way. Most of all, she'd missed Logan. Logan, who even though hurt her, more than made up for it every time. Logan, who fueled that fire inside her, the fire that had long since been extinguished. Logan, who always had her back. Logan, who picked her up and put her back together when she fell apart.

Logan, who, despite how many times she told herself otherwise, she had never stopped loving.

With these thoughts in mind, Veronica took a deep breath, and opened the bathroom door.

At the sound, Logan, who was standing next to the counter in the mini-kitchen, turned around, giving her a small smile. "Hey."

"Hey," Veronica responded, a bit shyly.

Logan reached out and grabbed a glass of water and an aspirin from the table, handing them to Veronica. "You probably have a killer headache, so."

Slightly surprised at his thoughtfulness, Veronica took it. "Thanks."

Then Logan gestured towards the table, saying, "I also figured you were probably hungry, so I ordered some room service. I hope chocolate chip pancakes with whipped cream and a side of bacon is still your favorite".

Veronica looked up from her glass of water, shock rippling across her face. She couldn't believe he had remembered. It's not like she remembered his favorite breakfast was an omelette with tomatoes, bacon, and extra cheese, with two sausages on the side.

As their eyes locked and they gazed each other, a wave of emotions crashed into her, so hard she was surprised she didn't topple over.

The thing was, she didn't remember the last time she had allowed herself to _feel._ Actually, that was a lie. She knew for a fact that last time she had allowed herself to truly feel ANYTHING was the night she left Neptune, a single tear running down her face as the plane took off. Not only had she left her loved ones behind, she had left her heart behind too.

She had started building walls around herself since Lilly died, and she rarely let them down. Only a few people, like her dad, Wallace, and Logan had ever seen the vulnerable parts she usually kept hidden. But when she departed from her old life, she had only built those walls even higher. And unlike before, not once has she let them down. Because she knew that if she let them down, the pain of losing her old life, the pain of the new life she despised would take over, and this time there would be no one to put her back together again.

But as she looked at Logan, looked at the person who represented everything her life should be but wasn't, she felt those walls come down, as they only ever did when she was with Logan.

And for the first time in nine years, Veronica Mars allowed herself to cry.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this is shorter, but I hope you still enjoy. I'll keep trying to update as often as possible!

No matter how hard she tried to stop, she couldn't. She just cried and cried and cried and cried. She cried about the fact she hated her life. She cried about the fact that she had felt so empty for the last nine years. She cried about the fact she didn't even recognize herself anymore.

Arms wrapped around herself, she cried because she was so alone, and she had been since she left Neptune.

But then she felt herself being pulled to a warm, strong chest, now wrapped in another pair of arms, with a hand gently stroking her back, and lips pressing against her head in comfort.

She sniffled, her tears slowly coming to a stop.

She realized she wasn't alone anymore.

* * *

For a few seconds, all Logan could do was stare at Veronica in shock. It wasn't like he hadn't seen her cry before. Hell, he was probably the person who'd seen her cry the most. But usually she only cried after some sort of traumatic event.

Lilly's death.

Her mom leaving.

Cassidy.

When she thought her father had died.

But this... this was different. This time she just seemed to be crying about... life. Everything and anything. Like the years of pain had finally caught up to her, and for the first time, she truly couldn't take it anymore. The hard shell she had around her finally cracked, and now everything was spilling out.

Shaking himself out of his reverie, Logan walked towards her, gently pulling her to him. Wrapping his arms around her, he held her close, rubbing her back, and kissing the top of her head.

They stood there together in silence for a long time. Logan knew that Veronica would talk when she felt like it, and pushing her would do no good. Besides, it didn't matter why she was upset.

It didn't matter she had hurt him (he had hurt her too). It didn't matter they hadn't seen each other in almost a decade (he has a share of the blame).

It didn't matter because as he stood here, holding the only girl he had ever truly loved, he swore to himself that he would never leave her again.

* * *

Logan just held her, letting her know he was there. He didn't say anything. Which was exactly what Veronica wanted him to do in that moment. This fact alone almost made Veronica tear up again. After all this time, after all they'd been through, after how much they'd both changed, he still knew her. Better than anyone.

She took deep breath, preparing to speak. Feeling this, Logan drew back, looking at her with worried eyes.

Taking another deep breath, she said in a shaky voice, "I hate my life. I hate everything about it. I hate my job. I miss Neptune. I miss my dad and my friends... and most of all I miss you,". Her voice broke on the last part.

Logan's heart broke as he heard the pain in her voice. He opened his mouth, but Veronica held up a hand, wanting to finish saying what she had to say.

"I'm sorry," she said. "I'm sorry for pushing you away. I'm sorry for not trusting you. I'm sorry for holding you up to impossible standards. I'm sorry I was so selfish. I'm sorry I left. And most of all, I'm sorry for never telling you that I love you. Because I did." She was full on crying again at this point. "I still do. I love you, Logan."

She looked at the ground, desperately trying to blink back tears. She felt a hand gently lift up her chin, and she looked up. Beautiful brown eyes brimming with love stared right back at her.

Logan cupped her face with his hand, wiping her tears away, also trying to wipe away that pain on her face. He leaned forward, placing his forehead against hers. "It's ok. It's ok. I forgive you. Do you know why?"

Veronica shook her head slightly.

"Because I love you too," he said. "I never stopped loving you."

They both had unshed tears in their eyes now, and for another second they just gazed at each other. Then, as if an invisible force was pulling them to each other, their lips connected. It was soft, it was gentle, but at the same time it was fiery and desperate and passionate. Then Logan picked her up, and set her down on the bed with a surprising gentleness. Then their lips collided once more, followed by their hands, and eventually their bodies, until it felt like their souls had intertwined with each other.

Afterwards, they lay there, facing each other, finding comfort in each other's warmth, and lying as close to each other as physically possible. Neither of them had been willing to accept how much they needed the other, how much they craved being near each other. But lying here in each other's arms, they finally remembered.

Logan broke the silence. "You know what? I think I may have been wrong all those years ago. As nice as THAT just then was... sometimes cuddling is the best part".

Veronica let out a giggle, and soon it turned into a full on laugh. Logan grinned in response. Neither of them could remember the last time they had been filled with this much joy.

Both of them had been broken for so long. All the tragedies they suffered, all the fights and lies and misunderstandings between them that led them to be torn apart. But as they lay there, cocooned around each other, the years of pain and sadness was overtaken by a new emotion. Because for the first time since either of them could remember, they felt happy. They felt complete.

They felt... whole.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Sorry, I knew the update took a bit longer this time. And I apologize beforehand for the sorta-cliffhanger at the end of this chapter. But I hope you enjoy. And please leave reviews; they will inspire me to update faster :D

For the second time in less than five hours, Veronica Mars woke up in the arms of Logan Echolls. But she wasn't complaining.

His arm was wrapped around her waist, his chest pressed against her back. Slowly, trying not to wake him, Veronica shifted and turned around, facing Logan.

Wriggling her arm out from under the blanket, she reached out, and gently stroked his face. Veronica drank in every single inch of it, having a hard time believing that Logan was truly right here, next to her.

Suddenly, Logan opened one eye, and looked at her as a smirk made it's way across his mouth.

"Enjoy what you see?" Logan asked, teasingly.

Veronica's lips curved into a gentle smile. "Immensely."

Logan's smile became softer. "This is nice," he said quietly, the tiniest bit of sadness making it's way into his voice. Although he had imagined holding like this very often (more like every night when he went to sleep and every morning when he woke up), nothing compared to the real thing.

Veronica snuggled closer, finding comfort in the fact that she was able to do this now. (She totally didn't imagine this every morning and every night, too).

"I love you," Veronica said into Logan's chest. She was still a little scared of the words. But she was Veronica Mars. If she could face gang members, rapists, and murderers, then she could face this too.

Logan's smile grew even wider upon hearing her words. He had waited for a long time to hear those words coming out of her mouth, and now that she seemed more comfortable saying them, Logan felt happy in a way he hadn't in a long time. "I love you too".

They remained there in blissful silence for another ten minutes, until a knock sounded on the hotel room door.

"I'll get it," Logan said reluctantly. He got up, putting on his pants and shirt. Then he leaned over and kissed Veronica, before heading towards the door.

"I'm going to the bathroom!" Veronica yelled, and Logan gestured to show he had heard her. Veronica walked to the bathroom, with a bounce in her step and a huge grin on her face. She didn't remember the last time she'd been this happy.

* * *

Logan walked to the door, expecting someone from the hotel staff to be disturbing them. To Logan's surprise, when he threw open the door, he was greeted with the frustrated face of his friend Rhandy.

"Dude, you said you would call me. Instead, you ignore FIVE phone calls from me?" Rhandy immediately said. "You had me worried."

Logan lifted an arm and ran it through his hair. "I'm sorry. I um... got uh... a bit mmmm... distracted."

Rhandy took in Logan's disheveled appearance, along with the stupid grin that wouldn't seem to leave his face. When he realized exactly what Logan meant, he snapped.

"Did you even THINK before you jumped back into bed with her? Don't forget that I met you a _year_ after you guys had broken up, and you were still a drunk and pathetic excuse for a human being. When I finally convinced you to join the Navy, you managed to fix yourself. But Logan, you can't do that to yourself again. You've grown so much these past eight years I've known you, and I won't watch you throw away everything you've accomplished just for that bitch. I don't think I'll be able to pick up the pieces this time when she leaves you again."

Upon hearing Rhandy's words, Logan's demeanor instantly changed. His eyes grew cold and unwavering, his smile flattening.

"Don't you DARE talk about her like that. I've told you everything about my past, and you know as well as I do that both of us were to blame for the explosion of our relationship. She's more important to me than you'll ever know. I don't care about our painful past, I don't care that she's hurt me. NO ONE is allowed to talk about her like that, understood?"

Rhandy gave a slight nod, having the decency to look a bit ashamed.

"Furthermore, it's been nine years, Rhandy. Nine years we've been apart. Nine years that we've had to grow. Neither of us are the same as we used to be. We've only reunited for a few hours, but I can tell she's not the same. Just like she can most certainly tell I've changed, too. I'm a full grown adult. I can make my own choices. I don't need you babysitting me. If you want to help me, then please just give us some time and space. That's what we—what _I_ need right now. You can go ahead and head back to Neptune without me. I'll go back when I'm ready. I'll see you, ok?"

Rhandy let out a small sigh. He knew that he couldn't win this battle. "Fine. If that's really what you need."

Logan's mouth curved into a tiny smile. "Yeah, it is."

"Ok, I'll text you when I reach Neptune, then. See you."

With a mock salute, Rhandy turned and headed towards the elevator. Logan returned the gesture, and closed the door. He let out a relieved sigh. He was glad that was over. He turned around, about to head back to the bed. Except when he turned around, he was met with the empty, blank expression on Veronica's face. His heart sank. He knew she must've heard everything.

* * *

Veronica came out of the bathroom, and heard voices coming from the outside the bedroom. She went into the main part of the suite, and saw Logan standing at the door of the suite, his back towards her. He seemed to be in an intense conversation with whoever was at the door. She tiptoed closer, trying to catch a snippet of the conversation. When she reached the middle of the room, she was finally able to hear some of the conversation.

An unfamiliar voice said, "Don't forget that I met you a _year_ after you guys had broken up, and you were still a drunk and pathetic excuse for a human being."

Veronica froze. She knew that her leaving had hurt Logan, but she had never really thought about exactly how much it must've affected him. She had been the only person Logan had left, and yet she walked away, just like every other person in Logan's life.

"-and I won't watch you throw away everything you've accomplished just for that bitch. I don't think I'll be able to pick up the pieces this time-"

She couldn't breathe. The words hit her hard. Whoever was at the door, he was right. She was a terrible person. She only ever brought Logan pain. She... she had destroyed him. The agony of this realization overwhelmed her, and she fought hard to blink back tears.

"-I don't care that she's hurt me. NO ONE is allowed to talk about her like that, understood?" she heard Logan say.

The words only made the pain worse. Even after all she had done, he was still trying to protect her. He'd always tried to protect her. And she didn't deserve it. She didn't deserve... him.

The thought resonated through her mind, and she came to a decision. This time, SHE would protect him. This time she would make sure she didn't destroy his life. This time she would make sure that he got the happiness he deserved.

She took a deep breath, and pushed all the pain into the back of her mind, keeping the tears at bay. She could break down later, when she was alone. As Logan closed the door, Veronica schooled her features into the practiced unfeeling masked she had perfected over the years.

Logan turned around, and she watched as he took in the expression she had plastered on her face. Gathering her courage, she said the words that she knew she had to say in order to protect Logan from herself.

"We can't see each other again. Ever."


End file.
